Dating a divorced older man with kids
People in unstable situations often make in-the-moment decisions that have nothing to do with what they may need or want as time elapses.A newly separated partner is often searching for validation and support and cannot see beyond those needs.
A man in grief, angry, unhinged, or feeling newly free of cumulative stress can be a vulnerable target for an outside person, or even an unthinking seeker of temporary escape.He may always tolerate this kind of behavior from them.It could be that he feels guilty about moving on from their mother.Or it could be that he never upheld firm boundaries with them.On the other hand, if he doesn’t allow them to disrespect you, he may be a keeper.There are many factors that can affect these triangulated relationships, and how they are combined can affect the outcome in different ways.
Time Elapsed A new separation is clearly more undefined.
So, you are attracted to a guy who is twice your age.
Perhaps he’s a widower and his children are as old as you.
Secrecy If the separated man is concerned that a new relationship might inflame the other partner’s decision, he may choose to keep that new relationship quiet.
Many people considering divorce are in the throes of conflict and don’t want another source of trouble adding to what is already a difficult situation.
This is a double whammy if he didn’t have a good relationship with them to begin with, as Carr and Boerner outline.